BLEACHY KEEN

Fancy seeing you here

 
 

Things my first semester taught me.

Oops, it's me again. I would apologise, but you're here by choice. So, it's no one's fault but your own.

Anywho, what with my first semester over, I've finally dragged myself through my last exams and essays for the term and thought I'd use my free time in a productive way before I inevitably end up crying my way through semester 2. So, I'm here to take note of a few of the things university has taught me so far, that I hope a lot of first year students can someday make use of.

Okie dokie artichokie: {this is a nice quick fire one, so I won't keep you for ages, don't worry}

  1. Firstly, it is 100% possible to get ready in five minutes. Don't ask me how, but I've done it several times and still made it to a lecture. {If it's not something you can do now, it's something you'll pick up pretty quickly}. If this is something that you're unable to master then make sure you're a stone's throw away from the uni when you make it into second year housing xo.

  2. Secondly, essays are not your friend and never will be your friend. {It's as if lecturers rejoice in your suffering}. So, for the love of god, don't leave them till the last minute. You'll just become a big ball of stress and all you'll want to do to relieve that stress will be binge Netflix with a fat bowl of coco pops {trust me, I've been there}. Obviously this means putting off your essay for even longer and before you know it you'll have 5 hours to write 2200 words on a book you've not read and you'll just regret every choice you've ever made {trust me, I've been to this dark lil corner too}.

  3. Number 3 can come as a big shock, but things are much more expensive than you think, and unexpected expenses are also a pain in the ass when you're trying to budget. One minute everything is fine n dandy, and the next your entire life has been turned upside down by the fact that the washing machine constantly chews up your underwear and you can't afford to buy more.

  4. On the topic of both washing machines with a penchant for your lacy unmentionables and other aspects of university that are out to get you, I raise Circuit Laundry to the table. Anyone who's been in first year or is in first year knows the pain that this stupid system brings. Apparently this is designed to make a student's life easier, but we all know it does the exact opposite. You head into the laundry room with high hopes and at best you'll come out with a sopping wet pile of clothes and a damaged sense of independence. Being an adult is not fun. Simple as.

  5. Okay, we now turn our attention to one of the biggest aspects of student life: Drinking. Now, drinking isn't for everyone, but I can guarantee that the majority of you will give it your best shot {please pardon the pun}. As a result, you will also need to develop a series of hangover cures. Now, I'm t-total as of this new year, but I can assure you I've had my fair share {or unfair share, whichever way you look at it} of hangovers. Unfortunately, the lessons learned from these are different for everyone and so there's no one-size-fits-all cure. So, all I can say is make sure you leave a fat glass of water by your bed {for drunk you to chug when they get in} and enough bread to feed a small family in your cupboards. Good luck x

  6. Right, last but not least, and probably the most important of them all: my first semester has taught me how to make friends in practically any situation. You're in a queue for the bathrooms in Live Lounge and the gal next to you is on her own? Tell her you like her dress. You're joining a new society or picking up a new hobby? Throw yourself in and ask if anyone else wants to go with you. Even when it comes to moving into accommodation, bring a doorstop and a pack of chocolate limes and you'll be making friends in no time {unless you're a meanie. In which case, stop being a meanie. Thanks}.

Anywho, that's that for now, but I can assure you I've learnt a lot more since coming to uni. So, there will undoubtedly be a part 2 to these little snippets of guidance.


I'll see you soon baboons x


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